I don't want to die alone!

I sold my first thing on E-bay! Hoorah! It went smashingly. I just recieved payment through pay-pal! Meanwhile, between paypal and e-bay, you get RAPED! Paypal makes you upgrade your account to get credit card orders. And e-bay charges you to list the item. So all in all it cost me like five bucks to list this thing. BASTARDS! Buuuuut... I SOLD SOMETHING ON E-BAY! HOOORAH! I'm now part of the millions of people who bought or sold on e-bay.

In other news.... I DON'T WANT TO DIE ALONE! But better to die alone than to die with someone you're not happy being married to. Such might have been the case here.
I just want to share with you a whimsical, care free, light hearted message of good will and joy left on my answering machine by my ex-fiancé. There was no hard feelings when we broke up. She just told me she didn't love me, and then handed me my ring back, and I left her house broken hearted.
It's the feel good story of the year!
Well long story short... She was at a restaraunt with an x-coworker of ours, (that she hated). Pleasentries were exchanged (she approaching the coworker, who happens to be my friend), and that was the end of it. Until...
The coworker (Natalie is her name) tried to leave. All hell broke loose then, and the 40 some year old guy she was hanging on, and a friend of hers had to hold her back from starting a bar brawl.
Again, the only thing that was said was "Hi Natalie, it's nice to see you again!" "Uh, oh HI Linette, ummm, yeah you too. See you around!"
After the two of them talked, and all that.
Linette was SO overcome with her rekindled feelings for me, that she was COMPELLED to call and tell me she loved me.
Here is that message.
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/theelectricgrandmadefroster/files/Linette.wav

NOTE: This is my yahoo group, and you might have to sign up/sign in to listen to the file.
God damn it, it's worth it though!

Ciao for now!

Pants... Threat? Or Death Trap? News at 5.

So, I got the most AWESOME sound file EVER! It's from my answering machine this weekend. It's of my ex-fiancé (who's nuts, and dumped me. Which makes her more nuts. I'm a catch baby!), and she's drunk, and swearing at me. I love it! It's so f-ing awesome. I've been playing it for everybody. I've got to get it in a wav format, and upload it here, and I'll give the whole story, and a link to it. But it's freakin' awesome.

Stay tuned.

Justin.... It's what's not sexy

Did anyone read the latest Men's Health magazine? It says: "Sorry Justin..." And goes into how my name isn't sexy. Them bastards. Now I know I'm not sexy, but at least I had a good name. Now that's changed.
Sad.
So very sad.

Adult Diapers Aren't Just for Adults Anymore!

Hey kids! Are you depressed because the cancer and death smoking causes stymies your trying to look older, and cool? Well put down your pack of smokes, and pick up a pack of Depends for Teens! Yes! Depends for Teens! Cheaper than your smoking habit, and looks great with your low riding jeans, or baggy low riding Tommy Hilfigers. Won't cause cancer, bathroom breaks, or accidents, and makes you look older than your parents!
When the fly honey's see that the odor and wetness are locked in on the inside, they'll want to get all over your outside.
Girls... Get that J-lo butt, without eating crisco... And guys, your baggy pants never looked baggy-er!
Very imitatible rapper Pee-Diddy loves them! Listen to what he has to say about Depends for Teens: "I can drink a 40, and not have to leave my stoop the entire day! I don't have to go anywhere, but where ever I go, there I am... And there's my Depends to soak it up. Much love to the folks at Depends"

Depends for Teens. It's what's going on all the cool kids today.

~Word~

Poodles, and the men who love them. The First Posting...

So, this is my first entry into my blog, and the WORLD of blogging. (Insert Eye Roll Here). I've had this thing for a little bit, but I wanted to start out strong with a good posting. First of all let me preface this by saying I'm in College. I'm going to school for graphic design. WELL! I'm old. 27, and going to college. My only solace is that there's a couple people older than me in my class. (Like late 40's/50's or so) Well, one of these oldies sits in front of me. Nice lady, wears elastic waist band pants all the time, but nice. So we're all doing our design projects in class today. Standing around our desks, cutting and pasting like we're back in elementary. (QUIET) And that chick just let's one rip! We're talking juicy 15 second elastic waist band pants splitter.
..............
Nothing.
No one says a thing.
There's a younger kid sitting next to her...
Not even a snicker.

Now, mind you, she's standing right in front of me, ass loaded and pointed at my desk and there's no way I couldn't hear it. But it was loud! For god's sake! And the room was quiet before hand. Didn't anyone else hear it? Or were they all just that polite not to even snicker? She's nice, she's borrowed plenty of stuff out to the class, but everyone (including her) carried on without a word about it.

Cut to me.

I'm turning purple. I'm trying to hold my laughter in, and I thought I was going to bust a lung
(Yeah, more on my lung problems later), and it's just killing me.
Kudos to everyone though for ignoring an embarassing situation. That was nice and polite, and totally unlike people in general, and totally unexpected. Well, either they were being nice, or I was having a flinstones vitamin trip or something, and imagined her tearing ass.
Nope, highly unlikely.
She's so prim and proper though... Like a Mom/Young Grandmother kind of.
Ugh, hilarious though.

Alright, back to god awful homework,

-Justin